Love Makes a Difference

Today is The Day!  I had to be at the Cancer Care Center by 7 a.m. for my initial blood work and education.  I was more relaxed than I thought I would be given how much I had freaked out while waiting for my port-a-cath procedure!  The nurses here are kind and very professional.  Everyone has put me at ease.  Remember how worried I was about my sore port?  My nurse, Sandy, numbed it right up no problem!

Here I am ready for my first chemo session.  

I get to sit in a comfy chair that even heats up or massages me!  I can watch TV or work on my computer.  I brought a bag full of things to do just in case... my coloring, a book to read, a journal to write in, and some medical information.  

My vantage point from my cozy chair!

TRUTH:  The love and care of friends lifts you up.  Friends have been delivering delicious, nutritious dinners, I have been receiving encouraging cards, text messages, and notes.  This morning a dear friend dropped in for a hug and some encouraging words while I was getting my blood drawn.  My bestie sent an amazing care package with 20+ individually wrapped (in my favorite color!) gifts, with notes of love attached to each one. 

 

Notes of encouragement I received this morning

 Package of love and care from a dear friend

I can't tell you how much each gesture, large or small, has filled my heart.  I feel like they add up into a positive account inside me, fortifying me for the difficulties I will face.  I have no idea how I can ever repay all of the love that has been shared with me, but I do intend to pass it on.  

A sweet friend thought I needed a crown for chemo days.  I put it on right when I got home! 

Thanks for stopping by!  Have you had experience with chemotherapy that you would like to share?  I'd love to hear from you.  Speak your truth in the comments below.

Truth

Hi Everyone!

My name is Laura Trapp and I am a 51 year old wife, mother, grandmother, and elementary school librarian in Helena, Montana.  I blog about education related issues over at trappedlibrarian.org.  You can read a post I did over there about by cancer diagnosis here.

On September 15, 2015 I was diagnosed with breast cancer.  My prognosis was/is good.  In fact, at first I really thought I just had "baby cancer."  By that I mean, I knew it was a small tumor, early stage, no clinical signs that it had spread to my lymph nodes.  It looked like I was "just" going to have to get a lumpectomy, followed by radiation, followed by taking a little pill once a month to keep the cancer from coming back.  I was "lucky" that my cancer was hormone positive.  So I thought this was going to be a 3 month bump in the road and I'd go on my way.

Ha!

Let's just say it's not really going to be that "easy,"  so I need a place to vent my frustrations.  If my story can help you or a loved one, I am glad to tell it.  But if you are here hoping to find someone dealing with their cancer with grace and sunshine, I can pretty much guarantee you are in the wrong place.  I am frustrated.  I am sad.  I am angry.  I am skeptical.  And I'm not going to hide any of that here.

Offended by swearing?  You might want to find another cancer site! 

True or False? 

Getting a port-a-cath installed is a piece of cake.   

FALSE!

 
TRUTH:  I got my port yesterday afternoon and thought I would go to work this morning.  I'm so glad I reconsidered!  I am sore, really sore.  It hurts to operate the hand soap dispenser in my bathroom!!  It's true that the procedure itself seemed pretty smooth and easy.  I even felt perfectly fine right afterwards.  But now I'm faced with the same feeling of pain and weakness in my left arm that I was just finally getting over in my right arm almost a month after my lumpectomy surgery.  Consequently I am even more afraid than I already was about starting my chemo tomorrow because I am afraid of the port site hurting.  

Okay, that lady above, she did not just get her port installed.  How do I know?  She would never be able to get back into that dress/shirt afterwards!  Ouch!

TRUTH:  I did something positive today anyway.  Rather than mope around all morning, I pulled myself together to do one challenging thing for the day.  I dressed up my top half as seen below and recorded a live Periscope about November picture book read-alouds for my teacher blog.  I am trying to challenge myself technologically and professionally and that in itself has been a good distraction while I am coping with cancer.  I wanted to do a periscope recording while I still had my hair because I don't know if I'll be that brave once I'm bald!  But of course that truth remains to be seen.

Me all dressed up for my Periscope.  I had 5 live viewers today.  I will go back and watch the replay to critique myself later when I'm ready to be kind!

Incidentally, if you would like to see a positive, uplifting, helpful site by a wonderful cancer survivor, I highly recommend The Silver Pen.  I have read some of the articles and watched a couple of the videos there and I really like them.  There is no swearing or complaining, either, so that's nice!

Thanks for stopping by!  If you are dealing with cancer right now, I would love to hear from you!  Speak your truth in the comments below!